Archive | October 2019

Are You There God? It’s Me, Dori

Are you there God?  It’s me, Dori.  I haven’t talked to you in so long other than a passing thought here and there. Although I guess there were my many requests to release me from the constant turmoil that my days ruminated in.  I remember the days I would walk around those walls that held me captive, begging you to release me, and you did. You released me in a very unexpected way,  but I thank you.  I thank you for the unknown road in front of me, and the husband you put beside me.  What a blessing he has been in my life.

Never in a million years would I have guessed this would have been your way.  Never in a million years would I have guessed I’d be sitting here today with this life.  I wouldn’t trade it for the world. The failures, the mistakes, the loneliness, and even the cancer.

Are you there God?  My eyes have water in them at the very thought of your magnificent power.  It has been said you are the Living Water.  Perhaps that is why our eyes fill with tears when our hearts break or even when we feel joy.  You are all around us and in us but the world forgets about you.  But today, Lord, as water fills my eyes I remember you.

Are you there God?   I see you when my husband squeezes my hand and tells me:  “Don’t worry we’ve got this, we will figure it out.”  He provides that unconditional love that I never thought I would ever be lucky enough to have.  You are there God, in him, in myself, and everywhere I am.  We are all right where we are supposed to be at this very moment.  I want to tell the world that you are there for everyone should they reach out and search for you.  (If you look for me wholeheartedly, you will find me. Jeremiah 29:13 NLT)

Are you there God?  Are you silently waiting for us to shut off the radio or the television?  Are you there when we step outside into nature  and are surrounded by everything you created?  Yes, I believe you are, you really are.

 

 

 

All Roads Lead Back to You

Who is God? Is He a he, or a she? Is He pure love, energy, our protector, our teacher? Is He the “Universe,” or all of the above? In grade school I learned that He is the Alpha, the Omega, no beginning no end. Infinity. Perhaps everything that happens to us in life comes full circle for a reason. The good times, the bad times. The victories, the failures, and oh the losses. Perhaps they all lead back to the One who wants only the best for us. Our experiences mold us into who we are and the roads we take.

How can we not see Him in everything around us? Even the sun, when someone takes fixed position photographs of it, taken at the same time of day over a year, results in the infinity symbol! A coincidence? I doubt it.

Sometimes life is scary. We are afraid of new roads so we cling tight to the old roads and the familiarity of them. We hold on with a death grip even when we know there isn’t an ounce of joy left walking that path any longer. We become like robots, listening to what we are told to do. Wear this, don’t wear that. Deadlines and unwanted commitments. More and more is piled on our plates and shoved down our throats. Yet, we grab our fork each day and shove another bite down. We stay in that “comfort” zone because it pays the bills, meanwhile our soul is snuffed out. Happiness eludes us while we stay on the rat wheel, then next thing you know your body will remind you of the torment you’ve put it through for so long. It shows up as illnesses, anxiety, depression, a lack of joy. We don’t have time for the things that really matter and the enemy laughs at us, saying “keep on walking this path, you sucker!”

Until. Until you’ve had enough. Until you say no to the constant demands and yes to you. Yes to your soul. Yes to those little things that have been put on hold for so long. You find a way. You find multiple ways to make it happen and not according to the way other’s think you should. It is not all in our own strength. Sometimes we have to look up and around us at all the signs and people in our lives that love us to know that we are not alone in anything we do. Hard to believe at times, I know. I have felt so overwhelmingly alone many times. But the road keeps bending me, molding me. Keep walking forward I tell myself. The rearview mirror is just that. I only look back to remind myself of the lessons life forced on me.

We have the power to create anything we want. Our definition of the good life might not match anyone else’s, but you will know when it starts to happen. You will embrace each day. Even if you worry about the details of the “how’s,” try to focus on right now, today as much as possible. We are all just walking on the road to infinity any ways….back into the arms that created that sunshine and created us.