I drove by your house today. The sky was grey and the rain was misty. The porch that we used to sit on was worn and chipped. The awning broken and bent. I wondered why it upset me so, after all you aren’t there any more. Your souls are in a much better place.
I remembered that house when it was clean and full of your peace and love. Cold percale sheets and the tic tock of the grandfather clock. The smell of sauce and fresh baked bread and endless hours of playing cards and sharing our thoughts.
No fresh nectarines awaiting to be savored. No ” I love you’s” or “how was your day?” Now you just talk to me when the wind blows or when the red bird sits near me just when you crossed my mind or I feel that empty spot left in my heart without you.
Yes, I know it’s just a house and everything changes. We aren’t meant to live here forever but I look forward to the day I will see you again. The house will be like new but a million times better. No chipped sidewalks or bent awnings. The garden will glow with light from every living leaf and petal. Your siblings will all be there and so will you. The sun will be shining down and all will be well.
I still miss you like it was yesterday but tomorrow will come and when it does I’ll let the wind blow in my face and I will smile, just remembering that yes indeed, it was just a house but a good one with people in it that made me who I am today.