Broken Dreams

“The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams”- Eleanor Roosevelt


Don’t we all grow up with a plan, or dreams of what we want our lives to be like?  Yet, along the way things don’t always go as planned and our dreams seem to get farther and farther out of reach.  We live each day in the monotony of the routine and somehow joy continues to elude us.

I just don’t think we were meant to live this way.  I think we were created to live a good life, and that doesn’t necessarily always mean in a monetary way.  A good life is not completely measured by how much stuff we have or what kind of car we own, even though those things can give us comfort.  How many pairs of shoes we have, now that may peak my interest!  But really it’s the heart of the matter that matters.

What are your dreams?  Are they attainable?  Have you ever stopped and really put some thought into what they are and if so, what would you do to attain them?  Are they realistic?  Would they bring good to your life and to the life of others?  What’s keeping us from following our dreams?   I can tell you what stops me: fear.   I hate that I sometimes let fear control me. Sometimes I push through the fear and I do it anyway and then I wonder to myself why I waited so long.  There is nothing to fear but fear itself right?

Maybe it is God who plants the seed of a dream within our hearts, and it is up to us to nourish the dream until it is real and alive.  So if He is the one who plants the dream within us, then maybe we should push past the fear, because if we do, we know that what He wants for us is greater than any fear we can face.  Maybe the enemy of that dream wants us to fear so that we can never accomplish what was meant for us, thus rendering us helpless and unsatisfied with our lives.  It’s just a thought…

I can tell you some broken dreams I had.  As a child I wanted a family that was whole and loved each other, but instead I was witness to some things a child should never witness.  As a teenager I wanted parents who looked after me and could give me some guidance on some things, but they were never around.  As an adult I wanted my marriage to work.  I loved my husband.  I kept a clean house and had dinner on the table each night, and I was the best mom I knew how to be, but my marriage dissolved and I was left heartbroken.  At that point I was done dreaming.  I was discouraged and thought dreaming was for fools.

But you know what?  As I got further away from those times in my life, I began to see things in a different light.  I saw that when I was young, my grandmother stepped in and took me out of that tumultuous environment whenever she could and provided a safe haven. I saw that God brought me my best friend Laurel who I’m still friends with to this day.  We have known each other for over 30 years.  It was her house that I would go to experience what a real family should look like. It was her mom that gave me guidance when I needed it.  When my marriage fell apart I learned to lean on a God who was there for me more times than I realized.  It strengthened my faith, because He was all I had.

So over time, I began to dream again.  I have little dreams and big dreams and I know that my plans may not be the ones that ultimately happen, but I try to remember that it is good to keep dreaming because it keeps the seed of hope alive in us and it allows our hearts to remain open to whatever comes our way…

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