As I sat in the church I listened as the priest said that this life time was like a blink of an eye compared to the time we will have in heaven. I felt the sorrow fill my young body as I saw my grandfather’s body lying lifeless in the coffin. His skin was as cold as the snowdrifts that lay outside on that winter day in Nebraska.
Who will care for my grandmother now? I decide then and there, that it would be me. So life went on with its sorrows but amidst those sorrows, there was always the sparrow. It would come and sit on my grandmother’s birdbath, calm and peaceful. It looked out of place there in the dead of winter. It’s almost as if God brought that sparrow just to come and comfort my grandmother.
When I would see the sparrow, I would think to myself; “how is that fragile bird surviving in this cold?” But each day it would return, and we would draw strength from its ability to survive.
Years later, as an adult I remembered back to those days as I sat in my new apartment after being married for thirteen years. I was going through a divorce and everything in my life truly had changed in a blink of an eye. I sat at my desk on the third floor of the apartment and I buried my face into my hands and I cried out to God. I wanted to know how I was going to take care of myself and my children. I wanted to know “why” all this had happened. I wanted to know why I couldn’t forgive what I needed to forgive. I needed to know that God hadn’t abandoned me.
As I looked up from my hands and out the window….I saw a small sparrow perched right in front of me on my window sill. The turmoil in my heart seemed to just freeze in place as I saw this. It was as though, yet again, God brought me a sign that He had not abandoned me and that if he could care for something as tiny and fragile as this sparrow, He would care for me as well.
Matthew 12; 6-7 says Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies? Yet not one of them is forgotten by God. Indeed, the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows.